Twitter / StephAntoinette

Thursday, February 18, 2010

John Lennon once said," Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans". I find myself having to stop for a minute and remember this quote. Lately I've been extremely busy with school and work, and I've been very stressed with the whole aspect of making plans. I have one more trimester left in college, and then I have no idea what will happen next. I keep trying to make plans for myself. Make sure I end up where I think I belong. But the truth of the matter is, I will most likely end up somewhere I could have never imagined. Somewhere that fits me perfectly, somewhere new and refreshing. And I'll have some sort of master plan, and it will ultimately be thrown away. No matter how hard we try, we can not plan out our lives. We may have an idea of how we wish for our life to be, but we can not foresee into our future. Our lives come together little by little. At times they make absolutely no sense at all, but in the end I know that everything will have a purpose. I'm only 21 years old, and I can already look back on my life and find meaning in a lot of things. There were instances when I felt so incredibly happy, like i truly belonged at the place and in that situation forever. Whenever an instance like this got shattered, I was upset, disappointed, lost...but now I realize exactly why things occurred the way they did. We all need to remind ourselves that our future will not turn out as we had planned, so just enjoy the ride. Take every situation and make the very best of it. And realize that if you are not happy at that moment, it will certainly all make sense in the end. And like they say...if it doesn't make sense, its not the end.


Tuesday, February 2, 2010

"Why are we here, and where do we go, and how come it's so hard?"

These lyrics to a popular song could easily describe what is going on in my mind at this very moment. It is not that I am regretting life or anything, I am currently thinking about others. The earthquake in Haiti has devastated all of us, yet some Americans feel that we should be more focused on our own country and victims from Katrina still need our help. I feel that this is a fair argument, and I do not wish to argue with others about issues such as these. However, my mother has spoken to a close friend who went to help in Haiti as well as Katrina, and she told my mother that Haiti is a nightmare. She thought Katrina was bad, and she had no idea what Haiti would bring. Victims screaming in the streets due to critical amputations done without any anesthesia, babies crying in the streets without a parent to ease their pain, mass graves with those forgotten buried with hundreds of others. So I always ask myself "How come it's so hard?" Why must these people suffer? Haven't they suffered enough? Why do bad things happen to good people? To innocent people. These people who have been fortunate enough to survive the quake are now homeless, they have no idea what their future holds. Their fight is not over yet, there is still a risk of infection, dehydration, aftershocks... They live in the moment knowing that their lives could be taken in any instant. But why? Why are there children sleeping alone at night? Why are there people without limbs? Without food? Without shelter? Without hope? This makes me so angry at times, these people will grow up with nightmares. With vanished relatives, no time to say good bye. They will feel empty inside, like the life has been sucked out of them. Their homes destroyed, forced to sleep on the streets. Their country in ruins. Their churches, their schools, their Royal Palace....dust. This world is so cruel, so misunderstood, so confusing. It makes me open my eyes and open my heart. It makes me realize that I am extremely lucky. That I should never complain, I should never feel the need to want more. I am healthy, my family is alive, there will be food at the table this evening, and tonight I will have a bed to sleep in and a roof over my head. Those in Haiti are not so lucky. Their hearts are hurting more than anyone could ever imagine. They have completely lost their way. They have imagines engraved in their minds that they will never be able to escape. They have seen dead bodies, they have seen orphaned children, they have heard the cries of those in pain and the screams of those in agony. All while I sit here typing on my laptop with no immediate worry or pain. These moments are what make me stronger, they make me want to help and change my ways. They make me realize that if I could change one life, or make one person smile, I will be a better person for that. At times we get away from ourselves, but we need to focus on what truly matters in this life. Love others, cherish memories, and live like today is your last day.